2008 Democratic National Convention Schedule

[overclock]

7:00 P.M. Opening flag burning.
7:15 P.M. Pledge of Allegiance to the United Nations.
7:30 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
7:35 P.M. Nonreligious prayer and worship: Jessie Jackson and Al Sharpton.
8:00 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
8:05 P.M. Ceremonial tree hugging.
8:15 P.M. Gay Wedding: Barney Frank, presiding.
8:30 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
8:35 P.M. Free Saddam Rally: Cindy Sheehan, Susan Sarandon.
9:00 P.M. Keynote speech: "The Proper Etiquette for Surrender", French President Jacques Chirac.
9:15 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
9:20 P.M. Collection to benefit Osama Bin Laden Kidney Transplant Fund.
9:30 P.M. Unveiling of plan to free freedom fighters from Guantanamo Bay: Sean Penn.
9:40 P.M. Why I hate the Military: A short talk by William Jefferson Clinton.
9:45 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
9:50 P.M. Dan Rather receives "Truth in Broadcasting" award, presented by Michael Moore.
9:55 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
10:00 P.M. Presentation: "How George Bush and Donald Rumsfeld brought down the World Trade Center Towers", by Howard Dean.
10:30 P.M. Nomination of Hillary Rodham Clinton for President by Mahmud Ahnadinejad.
11:00 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
11:05 P.M. Al Gore reinvents the Internet.
11:15 P.M. Presentation: "Our Troops are War Criminals", by John Kerry.
11:30 P.M. Coronation of Mrs. Hillary Rodham Clinton by Kim Jong-il.
12:00 A.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
12:05 A.M Bill asks Ted to drive Hillary home.

 

[TravisT]

lol, nice.

 

[daniel49]

yeah, heard that the other night on Lars Larsen show..... amusing.

 

[Schadenfroh]

Hahahaha, good stuff

 

[Don Vito Corleone]

Boy, the right really is witless! No wonder there's no right-wing Daily Show . . .

 

[Craig234]

Those poor right-wingers, grasping for anything in desperation.

HAHAHA Ted Kennedy drinks! And he's fat! Not compared to FATTY Michael Moore, though!

And isn't that Hillary a bitch HAHAHAHA!

And Obama, sounds like Osama so the democrats love him HAHAHAHA.

And Ted Kennedy drinks! At least he did 20 years ago. Glug Glug Teddy! big Michael Moore! Hillary's probably a lesbian and Nancy Pelosi too AHHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

The reason you don't see as many flags with democrats is they burned them HAHHAA.

Those poor right-wingers.

 

[TravisT]

Originally posted by: Craig234
Those poor right-wingers, grasping for anything in desperation.

HAHAHA Ted Kennedy drinks! And he's fat! Not compared to FATTY Michael Moore, though!

And isn't that Hillary a bitch HAHAHAHA!

And Obama, sounds like Osama so the democrats love him HAHAHAHA.

And Ted Kennedy drinks! At least he did 20 years ago. Glug Glug Teddy! big Michael Moore! Hillary's probably a lesbian and Nancy Pelosi too AHHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

The reason you don't see as many flags with democrats is they burned them HAHHAA.

Those poor right-wingers.

I didn't seem to see any of that in there. I guess I missed it. =/

 

[Genx87]

lmfao

 

[Craig234]

Originally posted by: TravisT
I didn't seem to see any of that in there. I guess I missed it. =/

Your mother told you that would make you go blind.

You did not see the cracks about Ted Kennedy drinking, about flag burning, you have problems with your eyesight.

 

[TravisT]

Originally posted by: Craig234

Originally posted by: TravisT
I didn't seem to see any of that in there. I guess I missed it. =/

Your mother told you that would make you go blind.

You did not see the cracks about Ted Kennedy drinking, about flag burning, you have problems with your eyesight.

Oh i did, but the joke was in the way it was told, not what they were referring to. Heck, we could sit here all day about how the left jokes about Bush's poor public speech. But in most cases it's not that funny unless told in a joking manner.

"Bush is bad at public speaking" is no more funny than the stuff you put up there. But even I find some of the blunders that Bush says funny if used in a joking manner. Lighten up, you can't live if you aren't able to laugh at your own kind.

 

[Martin]

Originally posted by: DonVito
Boy, the right really is witless! No wonder there's no right-wing Daily Show . . .

If this is what passes for humour with them, it would be cancelled halfway through the pilot...

 

[Steeplerot]

Good point, why do righties have no sense of wit? Their level of humor tends to be geared to schoolyard recess bantering.

Does anyone know of a right-wing funnyperson on the level of george carlin, robin williams, etc. etc. etc.

I swear these folks must have had a upbringing of humorless robots.

No wonder they are dead set on destoying the planet and humanity, laugh you fools, your all gonna die anyway someday.

 

[Genx87]

You bring up George Carlin and Robin Williams and proceed to tell the Right they lack humor?

k

 

[Craig234]

Originally posted by: TravisT
"Bush is bad at public speaking" is no more funny than the stuff you put up there. But even I find some of the blunders that Bush says funny if used in a joking manner. Lighten up, you can't live if you aren't able to laugh at your own kind.

The problem is that the right's 'jokes' tend to be simply expressions of their hatred, and therefore not funny to those who don't share their hate.

It's why you see so many of the things like the bandages making funny of John Kerry not having had the enemy shrapnel hit him in his organs rather than his skin.

And they tend to be based on lies, and/or incredibly stale.

My post was intended to illustrate those flaws.

In fact, you rarely see the left simply comment on a Bush gaffe, unless there's something notable about it, and it's still a small part of their commentary.

When Bush said, for example, that his administration was looking for ways to harm our nation, it got some laughs, and some liberals pointed out how his words seemed more accurate than he intended, but you did not see them say that he actually meant to say them, the way the republicans have so often claimed Kerry actually meant to say what he did in his botched joke about Bush, even when they have the written version showing them that it was not what he meant to say. Instead, they lie and try to exploit it.

For example, Gore spoke a bit awkwardly when he explained that he'd fought for funding the development of the internet; but before the democrats could laugh, the republicans were lying about what he had said and making it into a real campaign issue accusing of being a terrible liar - not so funny.

In fact, sadly, I can't remember the last time a right-winger made a good joke. I'd be happy to see some, aimed at democrats.

Democrats have plenty to joke about. but republicans have to make jokes, not try to just call democrats bad names and drag out accusations and call it a joke.

Funny enough, we have to turn to the liberal comics like Jon Stewart for jokes aimed at liberals.

Hate-based 'humor' is sad. It's the same idea as the racists, who have a lot of jokes that aren't that funny, but are just aimed at saying something of a stereotype as a way of letting them release the emotional tension of their hate when they can't say something directly. So, blacks like to eat watermelon and fried chicken! ha! gets a laugh from the racists, just because it's an outlet for their hate. Same with Ted Kennedy and John Kerry.

A funny joke at a democrat came from Saturday Night Live, when they had Bill Clinton review Independance Day, explaining the plot about a president whose wife is killed.

The punch line, that he loved that movie, was pretty hilarious, if dark. The right's telling even of a similar joke isn't as funny because they actually mean the hate.

That's why Chris Rock can do a hilarious video about how blacks do stupid things when arrested, but the KKK making a similar video wouldn't be as funny.

 

[Genx87]

Funny enough, we have to turn to the liberal comics like Jon Stewart for jokes aimed at liberals.

Because you guys dont have a thick enough skin to take it from a right winger. If a right winger pokes fun at a democrat they are being insensitive and it isnt funny. Obviously they lack humor.

Perfect proof of this is contained within this thread.

 

[dmcowen674]

Originally posted by: overclock
7:00 P.M. Opening flag burning.
7:15 P.M. Pledge of Allegiance to the United Nations.
7:30 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
7:35 P.M. Nonreligious prayer and worship: Jessie Jackson and Al Sharpton.
8:00 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
8:05 P.M. Ceremonial tree hugging.
8:15 P.M. Gay Wedding: Barney Frank, presiding.
8:30 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
8:35 P.M. Free Saddam Rally: Cindy Sheehan, Susan Sarandon.
9:00 P.M. Keynote speech: "The Proper Etiquette for Surrender", French President Jacques Chirac.
9:15 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
9:20 P.M. Collection to benefit Osama Bin Laden Kidney Transplant Fund.
9:30 P.M. Unveiling of plan to free freedom fighters from Guantanamo Bay: Sean Penn.
9:40 P.M. Why I hate the Military: A short talk by William Jefferson Clinton.
9:45 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
9:50 P.M. Dan Rather receives "Truth in Broadcasting" award, presented by Michael Moore.
9:55 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
10:00 P.M. Presentation: "How George Bush and Donald Rumsfeld brought down the World Trade Center Towers", by Howard Dean.
10:30 P.M. Nomination of Hillary Rodham Clinton for President by Mahmud Ahnadinejad.
11:00 P.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
11:05 P.M. Al Gore reinvents the Internet.
11:15 P.M. Presentation: "Our Troops are War Criminals", by John Kerry.
11:30 P.M. Coronation of Mrs. Hillary Rodham Clinton by Kim Jong-il.
12:00 A.M. Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
12:05 A.M Bill asks Ted to drive Hillary home.

Is that the best the radical right can come up with now? Bahahahahaha :laugh:

 

[Orignal Earl]

Originally posted by: Genx87
You bring up George Carlin and Robin Williams and proceed to tell the Right they lack humor?

k

You don't think they are funny?

 

[Steeplerot]

Originally posted by: Genx87

Funny enough, we have to turn to the liberal comics like Jon Stewart for jokes aimed at liberals.

Because you guys dont have a thick enough skin to take it from a right winger. If a right winger pokes fun at a democrat they are being insensitive and it isnt funny. Obviously they lack humor.

Perfect proof of this is contained within this thread.

Thing is that is so sad, is you just don't get it.

 

[Genx87]

Originally posted by: Steeplerot

Originally posted by: Genx87

Funny enough, we have to turn to the liberal comics like Jon Stewart for jokes aimed at liberals.

Because you guys dont have a thick enough skin to take it from a right winger. If a right winger pokes fun at a democrat they are being insensitive and it isnt funny. Obviously they lack humor.

Perfect proof of this is contained within this thread.

Thing is that is so sad, is you just don't get it.

At best pot calling the kettle.

 

[slash196]

You know, I've noticed something in my years on this earth, and that is this: Republicans seem incapable of offering any substantive criticism of the opposing side that doesn't fall into the category of Inaccurate Caricature or Ad Hominem Attack. When a liberal pokes fun at a conservative, it's called a joke. When a conservative pokes fun at a liberal, it's called debate.

 

[Genx87]

Originally posted by: slash196
You know, I've noticed something in my years on this earth, and that is this: Republicans seem incapable of offering any substantive criticism of the opposing side that doesn't fall into the category of Inaccurate Caricature or Ad Hominem Attack. When a liberal pokes fun at a conservative, it's called a joke. When a conservative pokes fun at a liberal, it's called debate.

And who is doing the debating in this thread and who took it for what it is? A joke?

 

[Aisengard]

Yeah, the Right doesn't really have a sense of humor at all. They just need more outspoken Jews on their side, since they seem to dominate the comic landscape.

 

[BoberFett]

Yeah, those "righties" and their failed senses of humor. Never mind that every time some loony lefty posts a picture of Bush next to a picture of monkey, people hoot and howl like they were at the Apollo. :roll:

 

[BoberFett]

Originally posted by: slash196
You know, I've noticed something in my years on this earth, and that is this: Republicans seem incapable of offering any substantive criticism of the opposing side that doesn't fall into the category of Inaccurate Caricature or Ad Hominem Attack. When a liberal pokes fun at a conservative, it's called a joke. When a conservative pokes fun at a liberal, it's called debate.

So nobody in this forum went after Katherine Harris, saying she's ugly? Good grief, some of you lefties have a got blinders on that would make a Clydesdale look like a pony.

 

[slash196]

Originally posted by: Genx87

Originally posted by: slash196
You know, I've noticed something in my years on this earth, and that is this: Republicans seem incapable of offering any substantive criticism of the opposing side that doesn't fall into the category of Inaccurate Caricature or Ad Hominem Attack. When a liberal pokes fun at a conservative, it's called a joke. When a conservative pokes fun at a liberal, it's called debate.

And who is doing the debating in this thread and who took it for what it is? A joke?

I wasn't referring to anything specifically in this topic, it was just a general observation. I thought the OP's joke fit well into the mold though.