Buying house with girlfriend

[oznerol]

Summary:

- Been dating 7 years
- Already lived together in college without any issues
- Currently don't live together
- House is currently bank-owned
- Would be the first home for both of us
- We can afford it
- House requires work which we're both willing to do
- We aren't married
- Split down payment and bills 50/50

So how bad of an idea is this? We both see the home as a worthwhile investment. The price is great, the interest rate is solid, and it's in a nice city.

Anyone have any experience doing this - buying a home with someone who isn't your spouse? Did it end up a legal nightmare as everyone seems to suggest? Is getting married first a more rational decision?

We're both very fond of the house and the price is right and we're thinking we doubt we'll see another one like this in this price range again.

 

[jlee]

Topic Title: Buying house with girlfriend
Topic Summary: Crazy?

yep.

 

[dabuddha]

Such a bad idea...

 

[spidey07]

The breakup is going to be extra complicated and somebody will wind up getting screwed, and that somebody means you. There is absolutely NOTHING good that can come from this.

 

[AkumaX]

u gon' get married?

 

[AkumaX]

LOL SWEET I SHOULD HAVE BEEN REPLY #5 BUT INSTEAD IM #2!??!!

 

[MagnusTheBrewer]

Originally posted by: JLee
Topic Title: Buying house with girlfriend
Topic Summary: Crazy?

yep.

yep. There's a reason marriage is an institution.

 

[DeadByDawn]

Bad bad idea

 

[Fullmetal Chocobo]

This thread scares me...

 

[ViviTheMage]

Originally posted by: spidey07
The breakup is going to be extra complicated and somebody will wind up getting screwed, and that somebody means you. There is absolutely NOTHING good that can come from this.

oh, so wrong here! that is overkill. Yes there is a chance they could break up, and a chance they could stay together forever.

I have been with my current GF for 4 years, we bought a condo together a little over 1 year ago and haven't had any issues. If she is short (she is still going to school) I just pay the extra couple hundred to make it easier on her, plus I make a lot more...Granted, she is my fiance' now...asked her a few months ago .

 

[AreaCode707]

Possible if you're both willing to be very rational about it. If there's even the least red flag when discussing these items and putting them in writing, call it off.

Plan to own it for x years unless, at that point, you both agree to keep it for x more years. Have plans for how you would handle an earlier sale if you both wanted to, and agree that one person alone cannot force a sale but can choose to move out and that finding a new roommate to cover that part of the rent would be the responsibility of person X. Have everything in writing. Agree on what you would do if you have to sell at a significant loss. Discuss how decisions about maintenance and improvements will be made, especially if one person moves out.

After 7 years, you probably have a good sense about whether this relationship is going to last or not. Do you see it lasting?

 

[Shawn]

just say NO

 

[sao123]

do not put her name on the deed unless you get married... not worth it IMO.

 

[vi edit]

I wouldn't let the replies scare you that much. None of us know your relationship but you.

My wife and I bought our house before we were married. Hell, she wasn't even old enough to drink at the time. And we survived that just fine much to the grumbling of her grandparents.

Married or unmarried owning a house together is still a risk. Even if you were married, she could still divorce you and depending on the state laws you could be forced to sell it anyway.

 

[MagnusTheBrewer]

Originally posted by: AreaCode707
Possible if you're both willing to be very rational about it. If there's even the least red flag when discussing these items and putting them in writing, call it off.

Plan to own it for x years unless, at that point, you both agree to keep it for x more years. Have plans for how you would handle an earlier sale if you both wanted to, and agree that one person alone cannot force a sale but can choose to move out and that finding a new roommate to cover that part of the rent would be the responsibility of person X. Have everything in writing. Agree on what you would do if you have to sell at a significant loss. Discuss how decisions about maintenance and improvements will be made, especially if one person moves out.

After 7 years, you probably have a good sense about whether this relationship is going to last or not. Do you see it lasting?

A pre-pre-nup? This is a social issue that already has a solution. A solution, I might add, that has passed the test of time, marriage. If you don't want to marry the lady, don't buy a house with her.

 

[dmw16]

Yep

 

[HardcoreRobot]

i did it with my gf
all good, 2 years together in house this may

 

[Phoenix86]

This has fail written all over it.

In caps.

 

[seemingly random]

Buying house with girlfriend crazy? yes
Buying house with future wife crazy? probably not

Even if attempted, expenses will never be 50/50.

 

[rasczak]

**looks into crystal ball**

i foresee many problems in your future.

money please

 

[oznerol]

Originally posted by: AreaCode707
Possible if you're both willing to be very rational about it. If there's even the least red flag when discussing these items and putting them in writing, call it off.

Plan to own it for x years unless, at that point, you both agree to keep it for x more years. Have plans for how you would handle an earlier sale if you both wanted to, and agree that one person alone cannot force a sale but can choose to move out and that finding a new roommate to cover that part of the rent would be the responsibility of person X. Have everything in writing. Agree on what you would do if you have to sell at a significant loss. Discuss how decisions about maintenance and improvements will be made, especially if one person moves out.

After 7 years, you probably have a good sense about whether this relationship is going to last or not. Do you see it lasting?

That's the kind of stuff I was looking for. Thanks.

I can see us getting married. I'm not in any particular rush, though. I understand that buying a home with someone is essentially becoming a business partner with them. I'd definitely trust her as a business partner.

It's more of an issue of timing, really. We both think the timing on the house is right - and can end up being not just a nice place to live, but a decent investment. Rushing to get married because of that seems silly.

And on the off-chance we don't end up together, I'm just looking for tips on what to look for - precautions to take. I don't see how it would be any different if we were married, bought a home, and got divorced. Neither of us mind signing documentation as if it were any business deal. The agreeing to own it for x years is a good idea.

 

[evident]

you know your relationship better than we do. people here aren't going to be able to give you the best advice simply because they dont know you or your relationship. if you know you're going to get married then i really don't see why not. but you guys better be mature enough to talk about it.

 

[AreaCode707]

Originally posted by: ducci

Originally posted by: AreaCode707
Possible if you're both willing to be very rational about it. If there's even the least red flag when discussing these items and putting them in writing, call it off.

Plan to own it for x years unless, at that point, you both agree to keep it for x more years. Have plans for how you would handle an earlier sale if you both wanted to, and agree that one person alone cannot force a sale but can choose to move out and that finding a new roommate to cover that part of the rent would be the responsibility of person X. Have everything in writing. Agree on what you would do if you have to sell at a significant loss. Discuss how decisions about maintenance and improvements will be made, especially if one person moves out.

After 7 years, you probably have a good sense about whether this relationship is going to last or not. Do you see it lasting?

That's the kind of stuff I was looking for. Thanks.

I can see us getting married. I'm not in any particular rush, though. I understand that buying a home with someone is essentially becoming a business partner with them. I'd definitely trust her as a business partner.

It's more of an issue of timing, really. We both think the timing on the house is right - and can end up being not just a nice place to live, but a decent investment. Rushing to get married because of that seems silly.

And on the off-chance we don't end up together, I'm just looking for tips on what to look for - precautions to take. I don't see how it would be any different if we were married, bought a home, and got divorced. Neither of us mind signing documentation as if it were any business deal. The agreeing to own it for x years is a good idea.

Look into tenancy-in-common as a business structure under which to own the property. TIC agreements may cover a lot of the legal stuff that you wouldn't have thought of but that would very much apply to your situation.

 

[vi edit]

If you really wanted it formal, you could probably talk to a real estate attourney and have some sort of contract drawn up for a couple hundred bucks.

 

[Gibson486]

NOt at all....you rent...you break up....you have nothing in end.


Either way, you break up, you could potentially have nothing in the end. With a house, there is a chance you lose the house...which basically means you rented the house. The only downside, besides a legal battle for the house, is if you break up and neither wants the house. If you both stop paying, both of your credit scores will tank. In this case, atleast you took her down with you