Have a question about depression...

[OverVolt]

Originally posted by: mobobuff
I'm guessing it's because your people-person nature has conditioned you to talk to others and conversate habitually. However you don't form a caring or understanding of the person you're talking to, or you feel overall apathetic about the encounter. So even though your conversations with them are genuinely good natured and enjoyable, your overall feelings afterward are disingenuous, and you're left with a somewhat subconcious void of emotion. Your way of dealing with that is to feel guilty about it, or second-guess your intentions of engaging in superficial conversation.

:thumbsup:

shrink babble ftw.

Yea I have depression too. Whatever

 

[mobobuff]

Originally posted by: OverVolt

Originally posted by: mobobuff
I'm guessing it's because your people-person nature has conditioned you to talk to others and conversate habitually. However you don't form a caring or understanding of the person you're talking to, or you feel overall apathetic about the encounter. So even though your conversations with them are genuinely good natured and enjoyable, your overall feelings afterward are disingenuous, and you're left with a somewhat subconcious void of emotion. Your way of dealing with that is to feel guilty about it, or second-guess your intentions of engaging in superficial conversation.

:thumbsup:

shrink babble ftw.

Yea I have depression too. Whatever

If that could pass as shrink babble, maybe I should consider a career change.

*grabs a notebook and pencil*
Mm-hmm, mmm-hmmm, yeah... how does that make you feel?
*scribbles*
Mm-hmm, I see... how was your relationship with your father?

 

[xtknight]

Originally posted by: Kilim
Also, and I am not given you a diagnosis, people with OCD usually can survive with it until they become depressed. It is the depression that comes with the excessive worry of making mistakes that finally gets people with OCD to get help.

Yup depression+OCD=bad. I'm that way but I just deal with it. It's hard not to trust your own conscience sometimes.

 

[amicold]

Originally posted by: wahoyaho
how can i tell if i have depression

Doctor, you'll know when you do, or you'll know something's wrong.

 

[Goosemaster]

thanks for the advice everyone

Many explanations on here, and qutiea few of them were interesting to think about.

I'm not OCD or bi-polar( not sure really).

It's the issue of recoverying from depression that's really confusing me.

What once was sound (the irrational) when I was depressed is no longer applicable or equates to total nonsense, and havinge to adjust is, to put it frankly, confusing. I am getting help and such, which has practically restored me to my normallcy, but the side-effect, as I've said before, is confusion. As some of you ellaborated on, is a sense of dissillusiionment[sic] after I try to talk about anything not related directly with my classes, as if that too is something I need to lose since it serves no purpose.

It's as if I have the city workers showing up two hours late, as in the movie "Brazil," right after Deniro has already fixed everything ,and insist on fixing something, which in this case is not broken.


Once again, thanks for the help, and I'll keep at it. At most the effect of all of this is a desire to speack less, but that only applies to certain social situations and not the majority of them. In addition as some of you pointed out, it makes me lacking, in an emotional sense, as if I didn't get a respectable ROI.

Thankfully I have a big courseload on my platter and amd really busy...


*gets back to learning AJAX*

 

[Goosemaster]

Originally posted by: Kilim
You may want to read this article to see if any of these apply to you.

http://www.ocdonline.com/articlesphillipson.php

It is some articles on OCD, OCD is NOT just washing your hands forty times a day, or checking the alarm clock twenty times. A certain trait of it is the need to constantly check and recheck, to ruminate and to explore your past actions. You may obsess that you may have misled a person, or that you may have "lied" even though you had no intention of lying or knew you were wrong at the time.

This is a major reason I do not post, I suffer from this, I do not want to be "wrong." It is also the reason I kept on changing this post before I even clicked "reply."

Also, and I am not given you a diagnosis, people with OCD usually can survive with it until they become depressed. It is the depression that comes with the excessive worry of making mistakes that finally gets people with OCD to get help.

http://www.ocdonline.com/articlephillipson6.php

While I am not the helpless Newt that they portray, that article is very telling.
The neurons are buzzing up there furiously....


Edit:


After reading that article, it seems that the concept of "owning truth" applies. With depression, I was robbed of almsot everythign I had, and I developed a quasi modus operandi that allowed me to function, anlthough in a limioted capacity.

It's as if I am overcoming this, I feel it wrong to revert to a stage where I knew how things were, and how I could get by. It's as if some sort of cage has been opened, and the modus is no longer applicable because it is no longer necessary, and every action that reminds me of it feels pathetic and unproductive.

Unlike my parents, I find that I can always leave my "truths" up for discussion, and this discussion, and my past methods, are in conflict as to what is applicable, what is obsolete, and what is still noteworthy enoguh for possbile consideration....

 

[Goosemaster]

Originally posted by: mobobuff
I'm guessing it's because your people-person nature has conditioned you to talk to others and conversate habitually. However you don't form a caring or understanding of the person you're talking to, or you feel overall apathetic about the encounter. So even though your conversations with them are genuinely good natured and enjoyable, your overall feelings afterward are disingenuous, and you're left with a somewhat subconcious void of emotion. Your way of dealing with that is to feel guilty about it, or second-guess your intentions of engaging in superficial conversation.

sort of...

 

[wahoyaho]

are there severity in depression?

 

[Rogodin2]

D

The DSM6 is now used by mental disorder professionals, you may want to volunteer for a test.

None of us here are professionals.

Rogo

 

[bobsmith1492]

Yay, self-diagnosed hypochondriacs repreSENT!

Not that I'm one of those, but still, reading those lists of symptoms of depression sounds like someone's reading my mind... hm...

 

[andylawcc]

Originally posted by: Rogodin2
The DSM6 is now used by mental disorder professionals, you may want to volunteer for a test.

woot? DSM6 came out?

 

[ethebubbeth]

you sound just like me goose.... i've always had similar issues.

 

[Willoughbyva]

Well, I have dealt with depression and some other stuff over the years. I feel a lot better now than I used to. I can say that perhaps you have some insight into what you are experiencing, however it is sometimes inadvisable to come to your own conclusions in matters of the mind. It is good that you are getting help. It is also good that you have the energy to think about this stuff that you are experiencing. Take the matter up with a mental health care professional.

I wish I could put into words or express what I go through.

Do you have routine or structure in your life? I find that it helps me. I also find that it is good for me to think about today and maybe the weekend, but not to much further than that. I do think about when I will pay my car off since it is hopefully just a couple months away. I am very detached nowdays. To be honest my mind has slowed down a lot over the last few years. Maybe it is because of all the worrying and crap I have been through over the last 10 years.

Even tho I am detached sometimes I wish I had a connection with someone. Someone who I could talk to about things. But I find that most people are wrapped up in their own stuff, and if I do get a opportunity I fear that I might give someone bad advice. So I try to have minimal impact on peoples lives for the most part. They seem to be humming along on their own anyway. I also hate conflict or confrontations.

I used to be diagnosed with OCD, then some other stuff to go along with it. Now I don't worry to much about the label. I am just great full that I have found a medication that helps me. I kind of miss the old days when my mind was abuzz with thoughts, but that was a long time ago. Still I wish for a connection with someone. Thing is I don't have anything to offer anyone.

Hope you feel better. I also hope I didn't kill your thread.

Perry

 

[Willoughbyva]

I think I may have killed your thread.

Sorry

Perry

 

[Herradura]

Better you than m I thought my post would kill it because it went to deep....

 

[alien42]

do you find that you are depressed in the winter?

 

[flexy]

hmmmmmm...interesting.

() the first interesting thing is that you put ALL the weight on what YOU say. In a true conversation and constructive exchange of opinions its more than one person participating in the conversation. The responsilbitiy that a conversation be "intelligent" is NOT only you, both certainly on every participiant in a conversation. Besidens, there is no rule which forces YOU that everything's said has to be "intelligent" and true down to the core, thought true and proven.

You have WAY too high expectations...eg. just "conversing" with someone...and i assume this comes from insecurity on your end.

There is another, related phenomenon...eg. if someone has a job-interview and is nervous....people tend to "overtalk" to compensate for their nervousness and insecurity.

Advice ?

a) if you think that what you say is BS...just cut back TALKING and start more listening to the OTHER person. Instead of putting every weight in your words listen to the other person. It does NOT hurt to agree with the other person and noone forces you you constantly give off "intelligent statements". If you want a conversation going you can ASK the other person about THEIR opinion, and listen.

Stop focusing on "the weight" of your words...that is almost egoistical/arrogant and and i am certain it can be received in a negative way and often MIGHT be recived as that by the other person. Instead of shooting for that your words are always impressive, whatesoever...accept the fact that noone is without fault, hardly ever even the most intelligent person ALWAYS says 100% the right things., nor is this EXPECTED.
Otherwise i could have debates with a machine.

If you are aware of your own faults and imperfections and TOLERATE that you actually might NOT always know everything you might come off WAY more credible and "human" in a conversation than someone forcedly always trying to make the best possible impression (which, of course) ultimately always will fail since we are all human.

Cliffs: As so often (not that i am even remotely competent in that matter)....i do think it comes from insecurities...and, again, it helps to realize that other people are NOT perfect either in many ways...neither they expect perfection from you.

Add: IF you say "my words seem emtpy"...again, nothing speaks against just asking the other person about their opinion. This is a cool thing to do and it will help. Instead of giving off some statements and then leaving the conversation asking yourself whether what you said actually "makes sense". If you're a people's person, why not just ask the other persons what they think about what you say ? Theres no rule against giving an opinion and asking the other one what he thinks about it. You might NOT do that because you're afraid of criticism...but then you might totally miss the point what real conversation actually is about. Its not that youre giving A LECTURE, instead its an exchange of opinions.

 

[Eli]

Hmm.. Interesting.

I think I'm dealing with a mild case of depression right now, but I have none of the issues talked about in this thread.

 

[Kev]

Originally posted by: Goosemaster
frankly, school teaches us to bullsh!t and I learned from the best

The thing is, I have been recovering from depression, and am doing particularly well now compared with the [even fairly recent] past. The issue I am having now is that I feel guilty after intelligent conversation with strangers. It's hard to explain, but in general, I feel as if I have just yelled out the biggest bunch of bullsh!t, regardless of whether my words actually carried weight. The real problem is that they have carried weight, in job interviews, and conversations with people in the library and such, and yet they feel "empty."

It's really driven me to keep quiet, and I'm kind of confused about the whole thing. I am fairly intelligent (kind of hard to tell from my posts ....fogetabouit ) but the truth behind this eludes me. It's as if I am attempting to be absolutely sincere with everyone I meet (which is pretty much my nature) but I feel awkward, as if I have been insincere when truly, I have not. To make matters worse, I am a "people" person and love to talk with strangers about whatever.*

Sure, everyone bullsh!ts here and there, but I find myself feeling bad about things that I should feel quite good about.


any advice, or other miscellaneous bullsh!t you can throw my way?


*maybe I'm just outgrowing that?

Stop overanalyzing stuff, it's as simple as that.

 

[Goosemaster]

Originally posted by: flexy

you read me perfectly....

I will take what you said to heart....

 

[Jeff7]

Originally posted by: Kilim
You may want to read this article to see if any of these apply to you.

http://www.ocdonline.com/articlesphillipson.php

It is some articles on OCD, OCD is NOT just washing your hands forty times a day, or checking the alarm clock twenty times. A certain trait of it is the need to constantly check and recheck, to ruminate and to explore your past actions. You may obsess that you may have misled a person, or that you may have "lied" even though you had no intention of lying or knew you were wrong at the time.

This is a major reason I do not post, I suffer from this, I do not want to be "wrong." It is also the reason I kept on changing this post before I even clicked "reply."

Also, and I am not given you a diagnosis, people with OCD usually can survive with it until they become depressed. It is the depression that comes with the excessive worry of making mistakes that finally gets people with OCD to get help.

The bolded part intrigues me, perhaps more than it should. Interesting.

 

[lyssword]

focus on something else. Forgetaboutit (watch comedy, workout, etc..)

 

[Goosemaster]

Originally posted by: lyssword
focus on something else. Forgetaboutit (watch comedy, workout, etc..)

<--

-learning ajax
-transitioing his desktop to osx
-learning autocad and another CAD app simultaneously
-takign two 3credit courses these first six weeks...
this weekend netted me only a few hours to work on comps and post

 

[NuroMancer]

I'd be depressed if I was switching to OSX.

 

[Goosemaster]

Originally posted by: NuroMancer
I'd be depressed if I was switching to OSX.

I actually like it....my xp machine has hardware issues and it got on my nerves..at least this one is problem-free hardware wise....

It's not so bad (core duo, 2GB ram, gigabit,etc...). I actually like it