Is love futile?

[ckkoba]

Gah, what the hell is love anyhow? I'm almost 23 years old, it's 5 a.m. PST and here I am pondering this question. So what, one day I'll meet someone that I'll say is "the one"?
Or should I just go out and screw every gal until one day I decide I should settle down? Then what? What if i passed up my love years ago, then I'll have to settle for someone I don't love but someone I'll grow to love later?

bah.

 

In your case it appears to be, stop thinking with your pecker.

 

[J Heartless Slick]

Love is a mechanism which encourages people to reproduce and possibly stay mated long enough improve the survivability of the children.

 

[freebee]

Over time, one does begin to settle for whatever comes along...and say..."its good enough"....

To be brutally honest, while most men would love to have someone that has a great personality AND look like Jessica Alba...it just is not realistic.

 

[ckkoba]

Oh goodness, I'm not saying here that the girl needs to look like Jessica Simpson or anything like that! I'm actually wondering if finding that mental connection with someone will ever happen. Or if it happens with more than one person... <shrugs> whatever. Kill this thread.

 

[radioouman]

Yep. It'll happen.

 

[godmare]

Originally posted by: freebee
Over time, one does begin to settle for whatever comes along...and say..."its good enough"....

To be brutally honest, while most men would love to have someone that has a great personality AND look like Jessica Alba...it just is not realistic.

That would be a matter of perspective.

 

[LeeTJ]

To answer the question, NO love is not futile.


Is there that ONE person for everyone??

heres a story, about 6 months after i got married, i met this girl. actually i was teaching an english class at a college and she was a student. we hit it off. wow, there was certainly chemistry and if i hadn't been married, i seriously would have persued it. but as it was, i love my wife so i didn't. do i have any regrets, NO, i love my wife and we have a great relationship.

is there just that ONE person?? no, in my opinion there isn't. in my opinion, love is as much about commitment and staying with that person as it is about how you feel.

 

[Josephus]

Love in our youth is merely casting our image of perfection onto another, when the image does not fit ;we fight hard to squeeze that other person into our ideal.

True love is understanding, accepting, and making accomidation for that other persons imperfections far more than it is admiring their perfection.

It is not futile, it is not easy, it is oh so liberating once found!

 

[Eli]

definately not.

 

[clamum]

no, love isn't futile and i don't think there is ONE special person either, as LeeTJ said. just be yourself, don't worry, it may take some time but in the end you'll be happier.

 

[Argo]

love is a pointless waste of time.

 

[Spooner]

the hell is the point of life without it?

quite dismal, i'd say

 

[Richdog]

good god...

 

[xirtam]

Originally posted by: J Heartless Slick
Love is a mechanism which encourages people to reproduce and possibly stay mated long enough improve the survivability of the children.

Many different kinds of love. If you want to try to break down love to make it fit inside the Darwinian model, then I'm afraid you don't know what love is.

Love will make someone lay down his life for a friend. This doesn't aid the process of reproduction. I will not listen to any attempt to rationalize this point.

Love, while needed for survival, prioritizes the needs for others above the needs of self. Whereas the Darwinian model supports self-preservation at all costs, and by modeling systems which show that each individual is entirely egoistic, tries to show how looking out for self-interests yields better overall success of the species, love forces Altruism's hand at the expense of natural egoism.

Or should I just go out and screw every gal until one day I decide I should settle down?

There's no Darwinian reason not to, but the reason you won't be satisfied with this option is because "screwing every gal" defies what love is all about.

Pick up a Bible. Read I Corinthians 13. For the purposes of this discussion, I don't care whether you're a Christian or not, or whether you subscribe to any other religious faith. I challenge you to come up with a better definition of what love is.

 

[Lola]

i don't know if love is futile, what i do know however is love is difficult. For so long we look and look and look for it, and when it finally does show up, it's even more difficult keeping it around. love is damn hard to keep up and keep strong. i suppose thats when you know its true love, when you just keep pushing it to succeed

 

[StageLeft]

A person can have a strong mental connection and love with more than one just single person out of the planet of 6 billion. I wouldn't say it's futile.

 

[GTaudiophile]

I feel your pain, man! I'm 23, single, and have never been in a relationship. I have been in love before, though, and two or three girls I've known have been in love with me. Had we been in different circumstances, things could have worked out I think.

But, everyone tells me to be patient and that love bites you when you least expect it. Self-confidence is also important. It will come.

 

[AntaresVI]

it never is....love is amazing, and essential.

 

[woolmilk]

Love is an emotion Like the early morning sun rising on a day in spring, always carried in your heart, knowing where you belong and whom you care for.

 

[Kadarin]

Typically, the best way to answer the question would be to ask yourself, "what would MichaelD have to say about this?"

 

[xirtam]

Originally posted by: Astaroth33
Typically, the best way to answer the question would be to ask yourself, "what would MichaelD have to say about this?"

Or, as the bracelet soon to hit the market, WWMHTSAT

 

[LeeTJ]

Originally posted by: ActPrincess
i don't know if love is futile, what i do know however is love is difficult. For so long we look and look and look for it, and when it finally does show up, it's even more difficult keeping it around. love is damn hard to keep up and keep strong. i suppose thats when you know its true love, when you just keep pushing it to succeed

i'll tell you what. your exactly correct.

one thing i'm sure of, if something ever happened to my wife and she was taken away, I would never love anyone again. it is just too hard to keep a relationship going. it's worth it to me, every minute, but i don't think i can do it again.