Question for Married Guys

[Jeff7]

Originally posted by: nobody554

Originally posted by: rasczak
that she now wants to upgrade. $)_&(#QU)($&)!!!!

This part I've never fully understood ... At least past the physical, women-like-pretty-shiny-things part. Isn't the ring supposed to be a symbol of your love and commitment and unity and some crap like that to each other?

Then why does it matter how expensive the ring looks? Shouldn't you be happy with a 25 cent ring from the toy machine things in the mall?

Well, at least get something that'll last longer than 5 minutes before it breaks.
Yeah, you'd think though that, as you say, the ring is simply a symbol based on some ancient ritual - and our inexplicable love of shiny, sparkly things.

Alas, many in this society 1) Fervently believe that "A diamond is forever," as well as whatever other marketing crap is thrown at them constantly, and 2) Believe that whoever dies with the most stuff wins. The symbolism you speak of does exist, unfortunately, the symbol is a dollar sign.

Originally posted by: Insomniator
Its also symbol of sacrifice, and women know that man value their money/work very very much. So a guy dropping 10 grand or whatever for marriage is a big gesture to some women.

A 25 cent ring shows no commitment or unity...

/girlfriend told me this

Did anyone else just hear some manner of whip in action?


Oh, and 10 grand? Um, yeah - not gonna happen.

Old tradition: Ugh, me kill big animal for you, beauty lady. Me love you. We do the nasty now?
New tradition: Throw money at it.


I still love the idea of the sort of wedding my parents had - a small celebration with a handful of people attending, a monetary cost of less than $25, and fairly minimal stress. The ring was also fairly inexpensive, a simple, small diamond. Marriage duration: I honestly don't know, but they were married awhile before I was born, so >27 years.

 

[Regs]

Originally posted by: DAGTA

I was actually looking to see how many men would understanding immediately what the question was asking, and how many men would raise objections to the use of 'downpayment on a wife'

That's not fair. We don't know who you are. For all we know you're a sexiest pig wearing a wife beater.

 

[AreaCode707]

Originally posted by: DAGTA

Originally posted by: DisgruntledVirus

Originally posted by: Insomniator

Originally posted by: nobody554

Originally posted by: rasczak
that she now wants to upgrade. $)_&(#QU)($&)!!!!

This part I've never fully understood ... At least past the physical, women-like-pretty-shiny-things part. Isn't the ring supposed to be a symbol of your love and commitment and unity and some crap like that to each other?

Then why does it matter how expensive the ring looks? Shouldn't you be happy with a 25 cent ring from the toy machine things in the mall?

Its also symbol of sacrifice, and women know that man value their money/work very very much. So a guy dropping 10 grand or whatever for marriage is a big gesture to some women.

A 25 cent ring shows no commitment or unity...

/girlfriend told me this

So what do women sacrifice?

Their ability to go have random sex? Their ability to get free drinks? Their money? Hmmm I can't seem to find one thing...

I never have, and never will, understand the whole "engagement ring" shit. Isn't that what the wedding ring is for? Granted I don't, and never will, understand the "logic" behind buying expensive jewelery. Especially from a created "rarity", because diamonds are not that rare. Sapphires and other gems are more rare, but thank you DeBeers for the most successful ad campaign in history....

I prefer to buy sapphires, rubies and emeralds over diamonds

Win, right there. Diamonds are lousy boring stones with questionable ethical origins at best.

 

[Nohr]

I never got my wife a ring (mutual decision). Just doesn't matter that much to us. Our 10 year anniversary was yesterday and we're doing fine without it.

 

[ja1484]

lol marriage.

 

[DAGTA]

Originally posted by: Regs

Originally posted by: DAGTA

I was actually looking to see how many men would understanding immediately what the question was asking, and how many men would raise objections to the use of 'downpayment on a wife'

That's not fair. We don't know who you are. For all we know you're a sexiest pig wearing a wife beater.

What if I am the sexiest pig?

 

[DAGTA]

Originally posted by: AreaCode707

Originally posted by: DAGTA

Originally posted by: DisgruntledVirus

Originally posted by: Insomniator

Originally posted by: nobody554

Originally posted by: rasczak
that she now wants to upgrade. $)_&(#QU)($&)!!!!

This part I've never fully understood ... At least past the physical, women-like-pretty-shiny-things part. Isn't the ring supposed to be a symbol of your love and commitment and unity and some crap like that to each other?

Then why does it matter how expensive the ring looks? Shouldn't you be happy with a 25 cent ring from the toy machine things in the mall?

Its also symbol of sacrifice, and women know that man value their money/work very very much. So a guy dropping 10 grand or whatever for marriage is a big gesture to some women.

A 25 cent ring shows no commitment or unity...

/girlfriend told me this

So what do women sacrifice?

Their ability to go have random sex? Their ability to get free drinks? Their money? Hmmm I can't seem to find one thing...

I never have, and never will, understand the whole "engagement ring" shit. Isn't that what the wedding ring is for? Granted I don't, and never will, understand the "logic" behind buying expensive jewelery. Especially from a created "rarity", because diamonds are not that rare. Sapphires and other gems are more rare, but thank you DeBeers for the most successful ad campaign in history....

I prefer to buy sapphires, rubies and emeralds over diamonds

Win, right there. Diamonds are lousy boring stones with questionable ethical origins at best.

The last girlfriend, I bought her a set of earrings that were heart shaped sapphires set in white gold with tiny diamonds on top. The set was over 2 carats of sapphire.

She dropped them off on my porch after we broke up.

A few weeks later my house was robbed and they were stolen.

oh well, couldn't give them to someone else anyway

 

[Regs]

Originally posted by: DAGTA

Originally posted by: Regs

Originally posted by: DAGTA

I was actually looking to see how many men would understanding immediately what the question was asking, and how many men would raise objections to the use of 'downpayment on a wife'

That's not fair. We don't know who you are. For all we know you're a sexiest pig wearing a wife beater.

What if I am the sexiest pig?

Are you a shoes salesman too? If so, I like you.

 

[zerocool84]

Originally posted by: Insomniator

Originally posted by: nobody554

Originally posted by: rasczak
that she now wants to upgrade. $)_&(#QU)($&)!!!!

This part I've never fully understood ... At least past the physical, women-like-pretty-shiny-things part. Isn't the ring supposed to be a symbol of your love and commitment and unity and some crap like that to each other?

Then why does it matter how expensive the ring looks? Shouldn't you be happy with a 25 cent ring from the toy machine things in the mall?

Its also symbol of sacrifice, and women know that man value their money/work very very much. So a guy dropping 10 grand or whatever for marriage is a big gesture to some women.

A 25 cent ring shows no commitment or unity...

/girlfriend told me this

HAHA sounds like you found the right person for yourself since you believe that as well. What a horrible way to think. I guess people's view of love and commitment has been so commercialized that they've completely forgotten the true meaning of these "traditions" they hold so dear.

 

[Syringer]

All this ring talk is making me really depressed/angry. I'm going to turn gay and hope that they never allow them to marry.

 

[alkemyst]

Originally posted by: Kanalua
Got married in College. either way, never pay retail for jewelry. My father has the hook ups in the jewelry trade. I got the ring (no diamond) for $50 (retail $300) http://www.tropicalcreations.n...ginal/page3/zflr-8.jpg (without the fake stone in the middle). Then got both wedding bands (matching) for $300 (retail $1500) kinda like this one: http://www.tropicalcreations.n...wotone/graphics/r3.jpg with this motif: http://www.tropicalcreations.net/heirloom/4.jpg (comfort fit, of course)...

As for the diamond, cash is king. Shopped around, and got all the estimates (and sales pitches - need to buy now, manager is up for a vacation promotion if he sells today, etc)...went ot the place that gave us the best offer (one time deal, can only quote you this price tonight, no good tomorrow) and they gave us the same price and all other stuff (diamond setting, sizing, cleaning, etc). If you take cash you will see prices drop...original price on our .5 carat solitaire round was $2000. Said we'd pay cash now, the lady dropped the price to $800 out the door. Came back two weeks later and took that "one time only" deal...sales woman was really appreciative that we came back, didn't give us any sales bull-crap after that...

diamonds and gold have set values for them as a commodity. Customization can be variable.

Retail in a chain/mall jeweler is a lot different than retail at a real jeweler.

 

[DAGTA]

Originally posted by: Regs

Originally posted by: DAGTA

Originally posted by: Regs

Originally posted by: DAGTA

I was actually looking to see how many men would understanding immediately what the question was asking, and how many men would raise objections to the use of 'downpayment on a wife'

That's not fair. We don't know who you are. For all we know you're a sexiest pig wearing a wife beater.

What if I am the sexiest pig?

Are you a shoes salesman too? If so, I like you.

Would you like to buy a used pair of New Balance, sir?

 

[Syringer]

So what exactly happens to the engagement ring after marriage? Is it kept in a mayo jar or something? And what are the distinguishing features between engagement and wedding rings?

 

[StinkyPinky]

Originally posted by: Syringer
So what exactly happens to the engagement ring after marriage? Is it kept in a mayo jar or something? And what are the distinguishing features between engagement and wedding rings?

Well, the story goes the engagement ring is the "big one" you're supposed to drop a lot of money on. Whereas the wedding ring is supposed to be a simple band.

Engagement rings are a load of crap if you ask me.

 

[DAGTA]

Originally posted by: Syringer
So what exactly happens to the engagement ring after marriage? Is it kept in a mayo jar or something? And what are the distinguishing features between engagement and wedding rings?

women wear the engagement ring and the wedding band together. some women get them welded together.

 

[lupi]

Originally posted by: buck
Her ring is about 5k, add another 2k for the wedding band. My ring was $100....

Then again, i get free sex for life.

For that much better be surprise butt secks.

 

[meltdown75]

Originally posted by: DAGTA

Originally posted by: meltdown75

Originally posted by: Adul

Originally posted by: DAGTA
How big was the down payment on your wife? Was it one month, two months, or three months salary?

dare i ask why are you asking this?

^^^ other than to think you're better than everyone that got married... i'd really like to know your other reasons, if any. i know that's the first one. DAGTA

Nope.

I was actually looking to see how many men would understanding immediately what the question was asking, and how many men would raise objections to the use of 'downpayment on a wife'

I know you're not my biggest fan, melty. If you were around, I'd take you out for some beers and mention to you that much of what I do on the internet is for amusement and information.

i just don't like people that come off as holier-than-thou. you seem to exude that on the forums, so there you go. perception of someone on an internet forum is what it is though, and i'm sure you could be a completely humble and amicable guy in person. unfortunately my willingness to go beyond these boards with the people here and actually meet them "IRL" is non-existent. i have too many IRL friends as it is, so i guess you're stuck with my online opinion of you, which doesn't mean squat in the grand scheme of anything anyway, because we're just two dudes on an internet forum. who cares.

 

[Engineer]

$100. I had no job so it was infinite salary.

Well, technically it was undefined as $100/0 = ERROR.

 

[Babbles]

Originally posted by: Syringer
So what exactly happens to the engagement ring after marriage? Is it kept in a mayo jar or something? And what are the distinguishing features between engagement and wedding rings?

Seriously don't know?

Most women wear their engagement ring alongside their wedding ring. You can go out and buy ring sets where they sort of lock together. An engagement ring is, typically, a solitaire on a ring (not always a solitaire, but I think that is the more traditional look). A wedding band can just be a plain metal band or a band with diamonds (e.g. eternity band).

The "traditional" engagement ring is more of an American thing. Some of the wife's good friends from Germany came to our wedding and we had to explain to them what the deal is. Makes me wish we lived in Germany . . .

 

[Turin39789]

I had a beautiful sapphire ring made, with white sapphires for accents instead of diamonds. I think it might have cost me 2 weeks salary, but maybe just one week don't really remember.

It's beautiful, but its still just a rock on a piece of metal. When it comes to my marriage its not really even on the chart of things that are important.

 

[dainthomas]

Originally posted by: Babbles

Originally posted by: Syringer
So what exactly happens to the engagement ring after marriage? Is it kept in a mayo jar or something? And what are the distinguishing features between engagement and wedding rings?

Seriously don't know?

Most women wear their engagement ring alongside their wedding ring. You can go out and buy ring sets where they sort of lock together. An engagement ring is, typically, a solitaire on a ring (not always a solitaire, but I think that is the more traditional look). A wedding band can just be a plain metal band or a band with diamonds (e.g. eternity band).

The "traditional" engagement ring is more of an American thing. Some of the wife's good friends from Germany came to our wedding and we had to explain to them what the deal is. Makes me wish we lived in Germany . . .

Yeah, the "tradition" is barely 100 years old even in the US.

 

[DT4K]

Originally posted by: actuarial

Originally posted by: DT4K
My wife and I spent about 1 grand on the rings, wedding, and honeymoon. We were poor college students. We got fairly plain gold bands, cheap flights to Vegas, a ceremony at Silver Bells wedding chapel, and a couple days of having fun and gambling.

Twelve years later, I spent about 6k on a ring with 3 stones (1.5 ct total) in a platinum setting. She LOVES it.

Again, you didn't really have a traditional wedding (though today you could not do all that for a grand, unless you got a REALLY good deal on the rooms in Vegas, which is where I just got back from on my honeymoon). I'm not saying you should have a traditional wedding, but if you decide to it's very hard to keep the costs down, which is what I was getting at.

Also, I hope you got thanked properly for that big piece of bling!!!

Very true. My point was just that the cost of a wedding can range from very little to a very lot, depending on a lot of factors.

Yeah, maybe it's superficial, but she had always wanted a nice ring. I've spent tens of thousands of dollars over the years on things that I didn't need, but wanted. So I just figured after 12 years of putting up with me, it was time for her to get something she wanted.

 

[Safeway]

I tried to tell my SO that I didn't want to spend a fortune on a ring when we have student loans and will have house debt. I told her I'd get her a beautiful platinum setting with a large engineered diamond. The ring would still be several thousands. Then, maybe at the 10-year anniversary, I would replace it with a natural stone.

 

[hanoverphist]

Originally posted by: DAGTA

Originally posted by: AreaCode707

Originally posted by: DAGTA

Originally posted by: DisgruntledVirus

Originally posted by: Insomniator

Originally posted by: nobody554

Originally posted by: rasczak
that she now wants to upgrade. $)_&(#QU)($&)!!!!

This part I've never fully understood ... At least past the physical, women-like-pretty-shiny-things part. Isn't the ring supposed to be a symbol of your love and commitment and unity and some crap like that to each other?

Then why does it matter how expensive the ring looks? Shouldn't you be happy with a 25 cent ring from the toy machine things in the mall?

Its also symbol of sacrifice, and women know that man value their money/work very very much. So a guy dropping 10 grand or whatever for marriage is a big gesture to some women.

A 25 cent ring shows no commitment or unity...

/girlfriend told me this

So what do women sacrifice?

Their ability to go have random sex? Their ability to get free drinks? Their money? Hmmm I can't seem to find one thing...

I never have, and never will, understand the whole "engagement ring" shit. Isn't that what the wedding ring is for? Granted I don't, and never will, understand the "logic" behind buying expensive jewelery. Especially from a created "rarity", because diamonds are not that rare. Sapphires and other gems are more rare, but thank you DeBeers for the most successful ad campaign in history....

I prefer to buy sapphires, rubies and emeralds over diamonds

Win, right there. Diamonds are lousy boring stones with questionable ethical origins at best.

The last girlfriend, I bought her a set of earrings that were heart shaped sapphires set in white gold with tiny diamonds on top. The set was over 2 carats of sapphire.

She dropped them off on my porch after we broke up.

A few weeks later my house was robbed and they were stolen.

oh well, couldn't give them to someone else anyway

lucky, at least you got them back, even if it was temporarily. my ex took all the sapphire and emerald jewelry with her when she left. she was never really a diamond fan, kind of glad for that. but 17 years of buying that woman jewelry was no small thing.

 

[ivan2]

was these one month 2 months salary thing pre tax or post tax?