What if Apple makes cars?

WalkingDead

Golden Member
Jul 28, 2000
1,103
0
76
I'm sicken tire of Mac fanatics that are around me claims the so call "superiority" of Macs over other platforms. Trying to reasoning with them is a big waste of time. I remember way back there were some joke list about what if Microsoft makes cars, then I got an idea of why not make one for Apple? With the collective minds in here, I'm sure we can make a very interesting list. Everyone is welcome to add to this list. Sometime next week I will post a list with all the good ones and I will print a poster with it on our Epson 9500 large format printer and tape it on my office door.




What if Apple makes cars?

1) It will costs three times as much as other makes but it can only goes 1/3 as fast. But yet, the dealer will tell you that it's 10.1 times faster than everything else on the road.


 

trmiv

Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
14,670
18
81
The speedometer only goes to 85, but certain Apple approved roads, it feels like 120.

The steering wheel is only 3 inches in diameter, but it comes in opaque bright green so that's OK.
 

calpha

Golden Member
Mar 7, 2001
1,287
0
0


<< The brake and gas are controlled with one peddle. >>


I like macs, but damn that was funny. Good One.

"Press the Gas Pedal to Go."
"Now Hold the Steering Wheel Button, and Press the Gas Pedal to Stop"
 

trmiv

Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
14,670
18
81
The Mac car can only drive down 50% of the roads the Microsoft car can, and most of them aren't any fun.

Only comes in an automatic.


Most of the Mac car owners like to boast of the technical superiority of their cars, but very few have actually looked under the hood.
 

joohang

Lifer
Oct 22, 2000
12,340
1
0


<< The brake and gas are controlled with one peddle. >>


ROTFLMAO! Exactly what I was thinking. That was hilarious.
 

brxndxn

Diamond Member
Apr 3, 2001
8,475
0
76
The cars will be bright and fruity - but the people driving them will be dark and gothic.
 

joohang

Lifer
Oct 22, 2000
12,340
1
0
Apple logo branded everywhere in the car with the pretty rainbow (or whatever) colours they got.

Apple logo on the steering wheel, the windows, the seats, the gear stick, the hood, under the hood, the engine, the battery, the door, the wheels, the tires, the back trunk, the mats, the A/C button, the speedometer, the RPM meter, the fuel meter, .... You get the idea.
 

IcemanJer

Diamond Member
Mar 9, 2001
4,307
0
0
Actually, joohang, you wouldn't see that many controls because a Mac car would never allow that much control over the operation of the vehicle by the user.
 

RSI

Diamond Member
May 22, 2000
7,281
1
0


<< Actually, joohang, you wouldn't see that many controls because a Mac car would never allow that much control over the operation of the vehicle by the user. >>

That one was good!

-RSI
 

kami

Lifer
Oct 9, 1999
17,627
5
81
Apple vehicles aren't rated in horsepower since it wouldn't be a fair comparison to the other brands of vehicles out there. A 50HP Apple is faster than any other 200HP vehicle.
 

Farbio

Diamond Member
Apr 9, 2000
3,855
0
0
its body would develp random cracks and stress marks after 2 weeks of ownership (ala the cube)
 

BDawg

Lifer
Oct 31, 2000
11,631
2
0
I'm sicken tire ofPC fanatics that are around me claims the so call "superiority" ofWintel/WinAMD machinesover other platforms. Trying to reasoning with them is a big waste of time.

People like you are just as bad as the people you hate. There are ups and downs of both platforms...only a moron can't see that.

And there was already a "what if Apple makes cars" joke. My favorite was,

Apple cars have more horsepower, better fuel economy, and are more fun to drive, but they only work on 10% of the roads.

BDawg <- Owned Macs and Windows machines for over 10 years.
 

jonley

Member
Jun 28, 2001
158
0
0
You could only open the car door by dragging something (?the seat belt) into the cupholder
 

novon

Diamond Member
Oct 9, 1999
3,711
0
0
Apple would only drive on 10% of the Wintel roads, but they would own their own super highway with scenery to kill for, and smooth reliable roads. They'd call it Interstate OSX.
 

Daniel

Diamond Member
Oct 10, 1999
3,813
0
76


<< You could only open the car door by dragging something (?the seat belt) into the cupholder >>



haha, nice, some days I would kill for an eject button.
 

jhu

Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
11,918
9
81
if apple made cars, it'd be like having a car designed by chrysler, engineered by bmw, and built by toyota.
 

glenn1

Lifer
Sep 6, 2000
25,383
1,013
126
Apple would accuse Microsoft Motors for lack of innovation, not to mention ripping off the concept of the wheel, which as everyone knows Steve Jobs invented.

Apple cars wouldn't run on gasoline, but instead a unique proprietary fuel that was only sold by 1% of the service stations in America.

Apple Motors would insist that speed trials and races run while in reverse gear and ease of parallel parking were the only benchmarks that mattered.
 

WalkingDead

Golden Member
Jul 28, 2000
1,103
0
76


<< I'm sicken tire ofPC fanatics that are around me claims the so call "superiority" ofWintel/WinAMD machinesover other platforms. Trying to reasoning with them is a big waste of time.

People like you are just as bad as the people you hate. There are ups and downs of both platforms...only a moron can't see that.
>>




Actually, I use two G3s at work everyday. You're right, PC people that I work with have no problem using a Mac. Only the Mac people are afraid of use PC, are those the morons that you're refering to?





 
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