Why do women nag?

[quakefiend420]

Originally posted by: Stumps

Originally posted by: AmerDoux
You agreed to make up with her parents so you could shut her up. She may not be able to verbalize what is going on with her feelings, but I am betting your lack of sincerity is bothering her, hence the continued nagging. Your getting along with her parents is important to her.

unfortunately for her I could live quite happily if a truck or tank ran over her mother..I get along ok with her father..but her mother...god damn what a beast!..and I tried to make a big effort in the beginning but i couldn't take the constant critism from her mother, and when i finally retalliated..I'm the bad person.
Now her mother wants to make up and I'm just suposed to be OK with it..I don't think so

sounds much like my ex-gf's mom...if she was to fall off the face of the earth i wouldn't shed a tear

 

[GolfCartRacer]

It's called PMS and their constant fight to become the Alpha Male of the relationship. If you cave in now you will be screwed for the entire marriage.

 

[DainBramaged]

Originally posted by: GolfCartRacer
It's called PMS and their constant fight to become the Alpha Male of the relationship. If you cave in now you will be screwed for the entire marriage.

Read the thread. She wasn't on the rag.

 

[Stumps]

well if my GF's mother isn't mentioned in any conversation or she doesn't call our place for week or so, everything is fine..no fights or anything life is good, as soon as the mother is mentioned WW3 breaks out, I have tried on many ocassion to explain what is going on to my GF and she says she understands and then the nagging commences and I am in hell, I'm sure if her mother was to die tommorrow, we could live in peace for the rest of our lives, but NOOO i have to live with having that interfering old goat stiring things up between us.
Her mother is the only thing that is standing in the way of our happiness.

 

[RMSistight]

99 Problems but a bitch ain't one
If you havin girl problems i feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one
Hit me

 

[Stumps]

Originally posted by: quakefiend420

Originally posted by: Stumps

Originally posted by: AmerDoux
You agreed to make up with her parents so you could shut her up. She may not be able to verbalize what is going on with her feelings, but I am betting your lack of sincerity is bothering her, hence the continued nagging. Your getting along with her parents is important to her.

unfortunately for her I could live quite happily if a truck or tank ran over her mother..I get along ok with her father..but her mother...god damn what a beast!..and I tried to make a big effort in the beginning but i couldn't take the constant critism from her mother, and when i finally retalliated..I'm the bad person.
Now her mother wants to make up and I'm just suposed to be OK with it..I don't think so

sounds much like my ex-gf's mom...if she was to fall off the face of the earth i wouldn't shed a tear

If you remember the simpsons episode with homer and his inner conflict of the evil homer dancing on the good homers grave, that would be me with my GF's mother.

 

[AmerDoux]

"Her mother is the only thing that is standing in the way of our happiness."

The only thing standing in the way of your happiness is communicating with each other and coming to some sort of understanding of each others feelings, needs, and a workable resolution. You really need to get some assistance in dealing with this because it isnt going to go away and it will make both of your lives miserable... which would allow the mother to win. Dont let her win. Go to marriage counseling and the two of you will come out of it a strong support unit.

 

[pennylane]

Originally posted by: Leviathan

Originally posted by: DainBramaged

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: DainBramaged
Don't marry her, it's a trick.

it's a tarp

Tarp?

I was wondering the same thing.

Admiral Ackbar. "It's a trap!" Except "it's a tarp"... there's a captioned pic somewhere....

 

[Kadarin]

Originally posted by: Stumps

Originally posted by: AmerDoux
You agreed to make up with her parents so you could shut her up. She may not be able to verbalize what is going on with her feelings, but I am betting your lack of sincerity is bothering her, hence the continued nagging. Your getting along with her parents is important to her.

unfortunately for her I could live quite happily if a truck or tank ran over her mother..I get along ok with her father..but her mother...god damn what a beast!..and I tried to make a big effort in the beginning but i couldn't take the constant critism from her mother, and when i finally retalliated..I'm the bad person.
Now her mother wants to make up and I'm just suposed to be OK with it..I don't think so

You know what they say about women... If you want a really good idea of what she's going to be like in a few years, take a good look at her mother.

 

[Stumps]

Originally posted by: Astaroth33

Originally posted by: Stumps

Originally posted by: AmerDoux
You agreed to make up with her parents so you could shut her up. She may not be able to verbalize what is going on with her feelings, but I am betting your lack of sincerity is bothering her, hence the continued nagging. Your getting along with her parents is important to her.

unfortunately for her I could live quite happily if a truck or tank ran over her mother..I get along ok with her father..but her mother...god damn what a beast!..and I tried to make a big effort in the beginning but i couldn't take the constant critism from her mother, and when i finally retalliated..I'm the bad person.
Now her mother wants to make up and I'm just suposed to be OK with it..I don't think so

You know what they say about women... If you want a really good idea of what she's going to be like in a few years, take a good look at her mother.

please don't tell me that..your scaring me...LOTS!!!

 

[notfred]

Tell her "shut up about your parents. They're assholes. I'll get along with them when they stop being assholes. Now leave me alone, I'm on the computer."
She'll probably be quiet.

 

[Inappropriate4AT]

A little wisdom from the System:

"My girl you know she lashes out at me sometimes, and I just FVCKING kick her, and then oooh baybeh, she's okay."

 

[Stumps]

Originally posted by: notfred
Tell her "shut up about your parents. They're assholes. I'll get along with them when they stop being assholes. Now leave me alone, I'm on the computer."
She'll probably be quiet.

no I already did that and it resulted in excessive amounts of screaming and door slamming

 

[montanafan]

"A son is a son until he takes a wife, a daughter is a daughter for the rest of her life."

Mothers and daughters tend to be very protective of one another; it's part of the whole nurturing nature of women. If you really intend to spend the rest of your life with this woman you need to try to have some sort of civilized relationship with her mother or it will be an area of contention throughout your marriage.

One of the reasons that your future mother-in-law may be so critical of you right now is the fact tht that the two of you have been living together for so long without getting married. Perhaps she is worried that you are not totally commited to her daughter and that you will hurt her, that's going to get her protective instincts going into overdrive. Once the two of you do get married it will probably go a long way toward alleviating some of her concerns.

If you make some effort to tolerate her mother now it would give your girlfriend more ammunition to defend you when her mother is critical of you or your relationship. Remember that it is your g/f who is being put in the middle of this problem between the two of you and it is extremely upsetting to her that two of the people she loves most in the world are criticizing the other to her.

 

[Acanthus]

Originally posted by: DainBramaged

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: DainBramaged
Don't marry her, it's a trick.

it's a tarp

Tarp?

The message is clear, if you make up with her parents, when you least expect it, they will wrap you in a tarp and throw you in the ocean.

 

[ch33kym0use]

they nag because they want to get dumped

i cant tolerate the nagging

as soon as she keeps nagging, thats it ive had it, she gets dumped

 

[Confusednewbie1552]

Pics of goat and gf?

 

[ch33kym0use]

li think its a result of spending too much time with each other

and that the love may not be as strong as before

absence make the heart grow fonder my friend, while in a relationship

that and having her dumped is sure easier on my nerves and confidence

only dump if its not repairable

 

[DainBramaged]

Originally posted by: lolock
li think its a result of spending too much time with each other

and that the love may not be as strong as before

absence make the heart grow fonder my friend, while in a relationship

that and having her dumped is sure easier on my nerves and confidence

only dump if its not repairable

I think you mean, absence only makes the heart wander.

 

[ch33kym0use]

yes that is also true

 

[Golgo13]

Tell her how you feel about her "nagging" (don't use that word though). If indeed the issue is resolved, then there may be something more to this. First, she just may have wanted you to show more sincerity when you made up with parents. If you gave the impression that you did it to stop her nagging without a sincere attempt to trying to improve family bonds, she'll read into it. Never NAG back and say "..look I did what you wanted ...now leave me alone" That's a big no no. She'll just express her displeasure indirectly through continued nagging or other passive aggressive behavior.

However, this could be a subconcious attempt, on her part, to drive you away and end the relationship. She could also be setting up an issue to halt the marriage.

Or

YOU may subconciously be having cold feet and creating or exaggerating this annoyance in your mind so as to question the relationship and create some sort of justification to avoid getting married.


As both of you get closer to marriage, you both start examining the relationship and each other more closely. The stress and anxiety levels are just going to get worse as you get into the wedding plan stage.

How far into the future is this marriage? How long ago was this decided? Why did the relationship with the parent sour in the first place? When did the nagging start/intensify? These are things to ask yourself and reflect upon.

Well, this could go on and on. Good luck to you and consider seeing a marriage couselor prior to actually getting married if things worsen.

 

[Bv3]

She nags because you've given in before. Nagging works.

 

[ch33kym0use]

for some women yes, I believe counseling will work to sort out the nagging

 

[Rogue]

ATOT can do a more thorough analysis of the situation with a pic or two. Here's mine to contribute to the thread:

http://shootagainamusements.com/itsatrap/akbar.jpg

 

[ohtwell]

Some women nag because they have found it to work for them. Maybe you have relented one time or one of her past SO's has, so now she thinks that if she wants her way all she needs to do is nag. Just tell her that it is bothering you that she will not let you deal with the situation on your own time and that she should respect you enough to let you move at your own pace.


: ) Amanda