I'll be the first to admit that I'm one of the few believers on this forum.
I was raised in a non-denominational church to which, I admit, I never cared for growing up. I resented having to go to church every Wednesday night and Sunday morning, and I loathed singing hymns I felt had no relevant bearing in life; not to mention I could always remember when we sang them last, which further added to my resentment in singing them. After the age of 18, I was finally given choice, and I chose to leave the church without looking back.
As the years went on, I found myself drawn to the logical arguments of fellow atheists. I remember watching YouTube videos on topical discussions regarding subjects like the creation of the universe and the flood, and comparing data between what the Bible taught with what evidence scientists have found in the field. I even remember reading/watching these things and frothing at the mouth for the chance for the discussion to come up between my parents and I, like I was just waiting and eager to create a rift between me and those whom I loved.
I had questions. Lots of them. Why is it the Bible states there was a worldwide flood when we find no evidence in the soil layers of any worldwide floor to have occurred? Why doesn't the creation story match with what we observe in the known universe? Slowly but surely however, God called me back. During this time, I also suffered from a great deal of depression. I would go jogging a lot when I was younger (still do), and I remember going up to the top of the USF Tampa campus parking garages and look down. I was too chicken to jump, but I wanted to.
I started to pray again. I felt like what harm could it do? If he's really there, he'll hear me. Maybe he'll even listen. Admittedly, this went on for a while. None of this happened overnight, but one day I woke up, and the feeling was gone. I haven't felt that since, and that was over 4 years ago. It was then I realized that my prayer had finally been answered, and maybe there was some real truth to this after all. Only now, I felt like I had actually experienced God's love first-hand; evidence I found very difficult to question.
Over time, my relationship with God strengthened. I realized more and more prayers were being answered. I become [much] more successful at my job, and even realized a level of fulfillment that I lacked for many years. My finances and ability to manage money substantially improved. I now find joy in life, even four years later, and that's something I went a long, long time without. Quite simply, I became a much happier, more energetic, more loving, more selfless, and more compassionate individual.
Before my ex's stepfather died earlier this year, we were having dinner at Outback Steakhouse and he asked many of the same questions you all have brought up in this very thread. He questioned me regarding things like the flood and the creation of the universe, and I remember what I told him. I said, "Dan, I used to ask those very same questions. And yes, even now those questions remain specifically unanswered. But what I can say is that given my experience and what God has done in my life, I haven't any reason to believe otherwise."
That's not to say that life has been without its struggles. I lost my friend, Dan, to a freak tree-felling accident in his very own backyard. The relationship between my fiance and I fell apart due to what had actually been cancer running through her veins all along. We've since reconnected quite a bit, but it's hard watching the love of your life struggle with her own. I'm only 30, guys. I'm not ready to have to bury her.
The difference is now is that I know I don't go at it alone. When I needed to forgive, I looked for God to teach me. When I felt like I had lost everything after the break up: My home, my family, my relationship, I felt him picking back up the pieces. I regularly take care of her, and when I see her suffer so much through her treatment and just want to fall apart, it's his strength that keeps me standing. Suddenly those questions of whether the flood really happened or how evolution doesn't align with what the Bible teaches don't really matter anymore. It's just me and him, and that's the way it's supposed to be.
I admit I don't have years of wisdom to fall back on, but I do know that given what I'm experiencing now, I wouldn't be able to get through it without him. One day this difficult chapter of my life will come to an end and trees and flowers will start blooming again. But what I can say is despite throughout all of this, God has made it abundantly clear that he's there, and that he's still sovereign. I would never wish any of you for God or religion to be forced upon you, but I can say that if you take a step of faith and believe in him first, he'll reveal himself to you. You'll find the answers you're looking for.